I am assuming my toenail lifted completely off of the nail bed and slammed back down again, in less than 1 second. The reason I have no idea what exactly happened to cause such a injury that hurt-still hurts-worse than labor is because I was in complete shock that blood was dripping off the end of my big toe. What just happened?
Before I broke down in a howling heap, holding my foot with the required washcloth and trying not to throw up, we had been joking around about where I had put the Dean Koontz book. I was sure I had put it on his nightstand, he couldn't find it, so I said maybe downstairs, and since he completely hates it when I change my mind I said, or maybe right there in your nightstand. At that point he slid, that's right slid, not hard, not fast, no bounce, just slid a small paperback novel across the carpet and it came in contact with my toe. It must have hit just right because it immediately ripped my toenail up. What are the chances? 1 in 99,999,999,999,999? I am no statistician, but those have to be some pretty good odds.
That is why when I went to the Doctor on Tuesday because the pain was excruciating and though it was no longer bleeding it was 'seeping' (how disgusting right?) , I told her Yes. Yes, even with his vasectomy there actually might be a chance I am pregnant.
I wouldn't let the doctor touch my foot. I started crying before she even made a move to touch it. I told her I would rather they go ahead and amputate my toe so no one has to touch my nail. There is nothing that can be done but just wait for a new nail to grow and push this one out. She mentioned that it will fall off on its own or get RIPPED off on accident. I passed out with that statement.
She gave me an antibiotic and I have to soak it twice a day. I just thank GOD it was in the summer because no-way-in-hell am I putting a shoe on. Okay, I'm back, passed out again.