My daughter's after-school program has something called Special Snack. It happens every Friday and as expected the kids anticipate what kind of sugar will be brought to feed their addictions satisfy their after school hunger.
Thinking I would save time and creative thinking skills, I signed up for last Friday, the day after Valentines. There would be sales at the supermarket bakery and I would be able to choose from an assortment of cookies or cupcakes. Yes, I took the easy Special Snack day.
Except..........I forgot. Not just forgot to go and pick up the reduced Valentine snacks. No. I completely forgot.
In fact, I didn't remember until 5 p.m. when I was shutting down my computer at work. My heart fell to my stomach. I opened my calendar on my Palm but I had not set a reminder....... snacks for 21 kids..........
Oh the guilt and shame, and if anyone can heap on the guilt for themsleves, I can. I was just imagining my daughter and her disappointment. She had reminded me all week and I kept telling her not to worry because I had. it. covered.
I started to project the blame, why didn't her teacher call me? why didn't Anna call me? They just had a Valentines day party they didn't need anymore snacks this week. We should have kept our meeting at work instead of taking it to Applebee's then I would have remembered. Aaaggghhhh!
I called my husband who after listening to my sob story replied, "So you are trying to blame her teacher?" I hung up.
On my way to pick up my daughter I had a fabulous idea. I called the church and asked them to send my daughter down to the front desk so I could rush in and pick her up. Part of my shame avoided. (Pathetic, I know. Chicken, oh yea baby)
When I got there I rushed in, all frazzle like, signed her out and grabbed her hand scurrying out the door. Immediately I heard about how I had forgotten special snack, that her teacher asked her when I was coming, that my daughter had asked to call me, that she was told to wait just ten more minutes, that I never showed up, that everyone was mad at her, that.........
It had to stop! I took both her hands in mine, looked right in her eyes and asked her to please forgive me. I was so sorry and that I will try harder next time to keep my commitment. She gave me a hug, put her hand on my cheek and told me it was okay she knows I didn't mean to forget.
I wonder if her teacher and classmates will touch my face and hug me when I have to face them?
Thinking I would save time and creative thinking skills, I signed up for last Friday, the day after Valentines. There would be sales at the supermarket bakery and I would be able to choose from an assortment of cookies or cupcakes. Yes, I took the easy Special Snack day.
Except..........I forgot. Not just forgot to go and pick up the reduced Valentine snacks. No. I completely forgot.
In fact, I didn't remember until 5 p.m. when I was shutting down my computer at work. My heart fell to my stomach. I opened my calendar on my Palm but I had not set a reminder....... snacks for 21 kids..........
Oh the guilt and shame, and if anyone can heap on the guilt for themsleves, I can. I was just imagining my daughter and her disappointment. She had reminded me all week and I kept telling her not to worry because I had. it. covered.
I started to project the blame, why didn't her teacher call me? why didn't Anna call me? They just had a Valentines day party they didn't need anymore snacks this week. We should have kept our meeting at work instead of taking it to Applebee's then I would have remembered. Aaaggghhhh!
I called my husband who after listening to my sob story replied, "So you are trying to blame her teacher?" I hung up.
On my way to pick up my daughter I had a fabulous idea. I called the church and asked them to send my daughter down to the front desk so I could rush in and pick her up. Part of my shame avoided. (Pathetic, I know. Chicken, oh yea baby)
When I got there I rushed in, all frazzle like, signed her out and grabbed her hand scurrying out the door. Immediately I heard about how I had forgotten special snack, that her teacher asked her when I was coming, that my daughter had asked to call me, that she was told to wait just ten more minutes, that I never showed up, that everyone was mad at her, that.........
It had to stop! I took both her hands in mine, looked right in her eyes and asked her to please forgive me. I was so sorry and that I will try harder next time to keep my commitment. She gave me a hug, put her hand on my cheek and told me it was okay she knows I didn't mean to forget.
I wonder if her teacher and classmates will touch my face and hug me when I have to face them?
I absolutely love the blog and heres the reason. It's real. The best of intentions sometimes fall through the cracks, but I think where we gain our strength is in our ability to deal with a good intention gone bad. You my sister not only did the most absolutely perfect thing I could ever imagine by admitting your mistake and saying I'm sorry,you also raised a pretty fantastic and forgiving daughter. It's easy to see where she gets her goodness.
-Tree
I am not sure how I got here but being me, I had to comment :)
I have done the very same thing. My guilt practically caused a stroke. I went through the same 'they should have reminded me', 'why didn't they send a note home earlier in the week' etc. Then stroke #2 happened when I opened my son's bookbag that night and THERE WAS a note..UGH! I still remember this like it was yesterday and it was at least 10 years ago! I know, I am pathetic.